steve wright quotes
steven wright Quotes
“Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID that he just whipped out a quarter?”
“Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.”
“Babies don’t need a vacation, but I still see them at the beach… it pisses me off! I’ll go over to a little baby and say ‘What are you doing here? You haven’t worked a day in your life!’”
“A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I’m afraid of widths.”
“The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing.”
steven wright Quotes
funny steven wright Quotes
“I have an existential map. It has ‘You are here’ written all over it.”
“I met this wonderful girl at Macy’s. She was buying clothes and I was putting Slinkies on the escalator.”
“I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.”
“I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I’m the only one moving.”
“I saw a subliminal advertising executive, but only for a second.”
steven wright Quotes
steven wright Quotes
steven wright jokes quotes
“I went to the general store, but I couldn’t find anything specific!”
Very funny stuff. Mainly because we never, ever by anything general. We buy something we want – a specific item, or see something we like and buy ‘it’ on impulse.
Start ups – B
steven wright Quotes
steven wright Quotes
Funny Quotes from Steven Wright:
“I got a chain letter by fax. It’s very simple. You just fax a dollar bill to everybody on the list.”
“I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five.”
“George is a radio announcer, and when he walks under a bridge… you can’t hear him talk.”
“For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier… I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.”
“Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?”
